Of Dark Lords, Epic Bunnies, and Horseradish

So I looked at my blog and I was like, Whoa, it's been how long since I posted? And then I was all like, I shall rectify this situation! I shall make a blog post! So here is blog post! Yay!
Book 64 was another re-read. Dark Lord of Derkholm, by Diana Wynne Jones, is one of my favourite books. To quote the back cover: 

For forty years, Wizard Derk's world has been devastated by Mr. Chesney's Pilgrim Parties - packaged excursions for tourists from the next universe in search of adventure. When mild-mannered Derk is chosen to play the role of this year's Dark Lord, he is forced by the sinister Mr. Chesney to turn his bucolic country estate into a labyrinthine castle lit by baleful fires, manifest himself as a nine-foot-tall shadow with flaming red eyes, and lead his minions in a climactic battle against the Forces of Good. 

Can Derk find a way to put an end to the evil Mr. Chesney and his Pilgrim Parties - once and for all?

This book is incredibly funny. The premise is brilliant. As I said here, it's probably the best fantasy parody I've ever read, second only to her other book, The Tough Guide to Fantasyland. I love Derk - the whole family, but Derk especially. Scales was awesome too. It was great how much hard work it was to set up all the evilness. Read this book. READ EET. 
In Six Words*: Wizard Derk is Dark Lord, reluctantly.
Book 65 was recommended to me by someone who described it as "A book about cute bunny rabbits that ends in a climactic fight scene." It sounded pretty awesome to me. I confess, the first time I tried it, I found it incredibly boring. I couldn't stand it. But I went back to it this week because I couldn't find anything else I wanted to read. 
And I loved it. 

The book was Watership Down, by Richard Adams. It is an epic book about bunnies. I love bunnies, but I honestly didn't think that was possible; apparently it is. This book is about a rabbit named Fiver who has a vision of something terrible that is going to happen to his warren. He doesn't know what - he just knows they all need to get away, soon. Most of the rabbits won't believe him, but with the few who do - Hazel, Pipkin, Bigwig, Hawkbit, Dandelion, Buckthorn, Speedwell, Acorn, and Silver - he leaves to find a safe place to live. They have lots of adventures along the way. I think my favourite parts were the stories they tell about El-ahrairah, the rabbit hero. 
I've heard this book compared with some other animal books that I am... ah... less enthusiastic about, such as the Redwall books or the Chronicles of Mistmantle. Aside from the fact that it's about small mammals, it's nothing like either. The rabbits in this book are not remotely human. They do not wear clothes or live in houses. They eat grass. I don't think I've ever really read an animal book that treated the animals that way, and it's one of the reasons I enjoyed this one so much. 
This book is going straight to the "favourite" list. 
In Six Words: Epic bunnies escape danger, find females.

Book 66 was Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can't Avoid, by Lemony Snicket. I love The Series of Unfortunate Events. Mr. Snicket's sense of humour is scarily close to mine. 
This book isn't a story; rather, it's a collection of quotes. Some are from the Unfortunate Events books. Some are new. All are hilarious. Being by Mr. Snicket, they are divided into thirteen categories: Home, Family, School, Work, Entertainment, Literature, Travel, Emotional Health, Affairs of the Heart, A Life of Mystery, The Mystery of Life, An Overall Feeling of Doom that One Cannot Ever Escape No Matter What One Does, and Miscellaneous.  For further proof that Mr. Snicket and I are much alike, here's one of my favourite quotes from the book:

Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.

Amen, Mr. Snicket. 

A library is like an island in the middle of a vast sea of ignorance, particularly if the library is very tall and the surrounding area has been flooded. 

*** 

If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuyt[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf.

*** 

Just about everything in this world is easier said that done, with the exception of "systematically assisting Sisyphus's stealthy, cyst-susceptible sister," which is easier done than said. 

...And I'm gonna stop now so as not to quote the whole book. 
In Six Words: Wit and wisdom of Lemony Snicket. 
***
In Other News, Script Frenzy is going swimmingly. As of today, I have hit 31 pages which involve peanut butter and jelly, shoplifting, cutting in line, ray guns, and Legos. Among other things. They are not too terrible.
Favourite Line: We have been kidnapped by a madman with a freeze ray. I hope you're happy. 

Footnotes:

*I am thinking about beginning to summarise each book in six words at the end of its review. What do you think, non-existent readers?